This is the first time I have ever "Blogged".  I stumbled upon this site looking for social networking sites that people use. 
I was looking for Patricia Humphreys.  She is the woman that was engaged to my father when he passed away back in 1990.  I received the Medical Examiners Report yesterday & thought I might try to find her to get some information about my father.  I last spoke to him when I was 7.  So far, I don't know much about him.  Just stories from my mother & older sister. 
I just found out about his death the day before his birthday on April 19th.  That was a sad day for me, it was a sad few days.  But it was lightened by finding my brother, Joshua.  He is great, lives in Denver, CO.  He came to visit me here in California 1 week from the date of my call to him announcing that he had an older sister.  It has definately softened the blow.  And now I have someone to share my __________ childhood woes with.  I put that line there because I don't have a word to discribe how growing up without my natural father was. .. . . up until very recently, it was very hard.  I had always wondered why he never came looking for me.  Why he never tracked me down as I had tried for the past 17 years.  My mother told me that I had to wait until I was 15 years old to find him. .. . that's when I started looking.  Only to find out now that he had passed away the year before. 
This has brought me some relief.  I no longer sit & wonder where he is.  I no longer anticipate our reunion.  I don't feel so "abandoned" anymore.  I had started to feel that more as I grew older.  I guess because I had felt that he really just didn't care if after all these years (24 to be exact) I had never heard from him.