Sunday, April 15, 2007

Sunday, my first day

This is the first time I have ever "Blogged". I stumbled upon this site looking for social networking sites that people use.

I was looking for Patricia Humphreys. She is the woman that was engaged to my father when he passed away back in 1990. I received the Medical Examiners Report yesterday & thought I might try to find her to get some information about my father. I last spoke to him when I was 7. So far, I don't know much about him. Just stories from my mother & older sister.

I just found out about his death the day before his birthday on April 19th. That was a sad day for me, it was a sad few days. But it was lightened by finding my brother, Joshua. He is great, lives in Denver, CO. He came to visit me here in California 1 week from the date of my call to him announcing that he had an older sister. It has definately softened the blow. And now I have someone to share my __________ childhood woes with. I put that line there because I don't have a word to discribe how growing up without my natural father was. .. . . up until very recently, it was very hard. I had always wondered why he never came looking for me. Why he never tracked me down as I had tried for the past 17 years. My mother told me that I had to wait until I was 15 years old to find him. .. . that's when I started looking. Only to find out now that he had passed away the year before.

This has brought me some relief. I no longer sit & wonder where he is. I no longer anticipate our reunion. I don't feel so "abandoned" anymore. I had started to feel that more as I grew older. I guess because I had felt that he really just didn't care if after all these years (24 to be exact) I had never heard from him.
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